Unreasonable Reasons To Call Out Of Work

Every morning I wake up trying to convince myself that I don’t actually have to get up because it’s my day off. I usually can’t fool myself with that for too long, so next I start going through the list of reasons that are preventing me from being able to go to work that day. I picture myself calling my boss and try to imagine what would sound the best. It goes something like this:

“Hey it’s Sarah. So, yeah… I’m not going to make it into work today. Nope, I can’t because…

…I stayed up too late last night working on my blog. It had been a few days since I last posted and I owed it to my readers! Plus I got this great idea at 11:30pm, so I just had to get it written down.”

…dinner took too long, baths started late, then the kids didn’t get to bed on time. By the time I had cleaned up the kitchen, it was after 9 o’clock and I still needed to paint my nails. But I didn’t paint my nails because I was afraid that they wouldn’t have enough time to dry and they’d get those blanket wrinkles. So I didn’t end up painting my nails and they look really bad. Definitely too bad to go to work.”

…I have too many shows on my DVR. I was planning to watch a few yesterday, but ran out of time. I need to get caught up.”

…Frozen comes out on blu-ray tomorrow and since we pre-ordered it on Amazon, it’s going to arrive at my house. I want to be able to watch it as soon as possible. I mean the kids. The kids do.”

…I overslept and don’t have time to wash my hair. But it’s been something like 3 days since I last washed it and it really needs it. I’m not sure I can make it work for one more day. Plus I should probably shave my legs.”

…I ran out of my cocoa butter lotion and I need to go to Wal-Mart because they aren’t carrying it on soap.com anymore, but I need to be able to go to Wal-Mart when the kids are at daycare because it’s just too hard to go there with them. Too many dirty surfaces.”

…I was supposed to do laundry yesterday. But I didn’t.”

…the dinner that I have planned for tonight will take a while to make and I’d rather start cooking it early and not after 6 o’clock which is when I would be getting home if I went to work. And I still need to paint my nails.”

…I have too many conference calls on my schedule today. Too many.”

…I never went to the grocery store this weekend and I have no food. I mean, I have a bunch of cans of diced tomatoes and a few 1/2 boxes of cereal, but nothing I can give to the kids. They had cereal for dinner yesterday.”

…I should probably start working out today. Instead of going to work.”

…I’m tired and I’d rather stay in bed cuddling with my kids.”

While I find some of these reasons perfectly reasonable, none of them sound good enough to actually try out. Maybe I’ll come up with something better tomorrow. Right now I’m up late working on the blog with wet nails, hmmmmm…


Anyone wanna volunteer?

16 thoughts on “Unreasonable Reasons To Call Out Of Work

  1. Every new post is my favorite! omg so funny! I see all these moms on ig and on blogs who seem like they have all their shit together…. girl, you don’t even wanna know what I looked like today when I stepped out to run errands. I put on eyeliner thinking that would help and then I got sleepy driving so I rubbed my eyes… guess how I looked after that? I couldn’t figure out why the cashier at Staples was looking at me so weird. And then I went into Walmart and I must’ve fit right in because I got no weird looks lol

    • Awwe thanks! I am here to tell you that I do NOT have it all together! Not one bit. Vacuuming should have happened today. It didn’t. Can I call out for that??

      • Haha yesss you can! We used to let S eat in the living and now that she has restricted eating areas it really helps with the messes she used to leave behind. A now eats 3 meals a day + 4-5 bottles + she wants puffs all day long. I’m amazed I can accomplish anything lol

  2. my days are crazy, i am at home with screaming kids all day and they dont care if i look pretty at all, so i dont. i havent painted my nails in years and i miss it. and if icould figure out how to call in sick for my job i would do it frequently. im gonna go cry into my pillow, not really lol

    • Don’t cry into your pillow haha! I recently started painting my nails. I didn’t even do it regularly before kids but I find that having pretty nails helps me feel good!

    • Thank you so much! That’s too funny bc another blogger nominated me last week. I’ll update my Liebster post before publishing! I appreciate it, you’re the best!

  3. This doesn’t happen to me often because I like my job a lot. But some mornings… I have this whole long argument with myself.

    • I have such a hard time wrangling both kids out the door that it always seems like staying home world be far easier! Plus I’m always exhausted in the morning.

  4. Pingback: Six Months of Twos and Threes: A Retrospective | Two Three Or Not Two Three...

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