My {last minute} letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

I know that this is really cutting it close, but by all accounts you are all types of magical, so I thought I’d go ahead and put in my requests since I would classify myself as belonging on the “nice” list this year.

I’ll start with the stocking stuffers:

Now I know that I would have cursed you seven ways to Santa’s village if you had even  thought about putting any of these things into my stocking when I was growing up, but hey – things have changed. What I’d like in my stocking is shaving cream, contact solution, refills for my razor, eye makeup remover, cotton squares and volumizing mousse. These are things that I always need, always forget to pick up when I’m at the store and never have time to make a special trip for. Some of them are also oddly expensive. Like the razor refills and contact solution; way more expensive than they ought to be. So stock me up! If you could also throw an orange and a dime into the bottom of my stocking, that would be great. It might sound like an odd request, but my mom always put an orange and a dime into our stockings as kids. I’m not sure why she did this, but my assumption is that the orange was to ward off the scurvy that I was likely to catch while depositing the dime into a payphone. Is that right, Mom?

Now for the gifts:

Spanx – I’ve had two kids. Things aren’t where they used to be and I know lots of people who swear by Spanx. I’ve used Spanx once before and I have to say that I was not impressed, but I’m willing to give them another try. When I was 36 weeks pregnant, I was in a wedding and really wanted to have a nice, flat tummy which is what I thought they were for. Maybe I bought the wrong size or something, but my stomach still was sticking out. A lot. I’ll give them one more shot.

All the Christmas movies – Yes, I’d like them all. Even the ones that are Lifetime originals. Actually, especially those ones. See, once we pass Thanksgiving, Christmas movies start playing non-stop on TV and I love it! I spend every spare second soaking up the holiday goodness, but as soon as December 26th hits, they are pulled from the lineup and we are back to our regularly scheduled programming. I need to have all of the Christmas movies so that I can slowly wean myself off instead of dropping them cold turkey style.

A personal chef – Again, I have two kids. If that’s not enough, read this.

A gift card to the grocery store – Some may call this boring, but this is actually where I spend the majority of my money that does not pay for those pesky little things like the house, car, daycare, phone, electricity, etc. I drop $100+ at the grocery store every Sunday, so I promise that it will not go to waste!

A glam squad – I’m always seeing moms that are so put together, with their perfect hair and makeup, fancy clothes, fancy kids and to top it all off, they are always crafting and pintresting about it! I can barely get mascara on both eyes without my kids having flushed half of the roll of toilet paper down the toilet. I’d like a glam squad and a photographer to follow me around so that I can post pics of myself on various forms or social media looking like I have it all figured out.

Ok, I think that should be enough for this year! Have a wonderful off-peak season and we’ll chat again next winter!

Merry Christmas to all. And to all a good night!

xoxo

Sarah

stockings

Filled with practical toiletries I hope.

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